Should you search for yourself?

We have access to more than what we need today. And yet we feel incomplete. We have a lot but yet, the heart searches for something. Many are in search of something, some are in search of finding out themselves, who they are! It’s a great question. Ramana Maharshi, a great Indian philosopher, and saint also said, the most important question to ask ourselves is, “Who am I?” Constantly discovering ourselves and avoiding getting too attached to any of the labels, judgments, roles, or identities that we don in life. I think it’s a powerful search.  In the process of...
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You are here because you chose to be!

This is one of the most powerful sentences! I am sure many of you would have read this sentence or something on similar lines before. When I read it, it was like as if my entire life just paused for a minute and I floated above it to see - that I am here because I chose to be. So, everything that is happening, that has happened, and that will happen is for me. Exclusively for me! And there’s nothing good or bad. There’s just intense, less intense, or highly intense moments that each offer me something valuable. When I...
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How to overcome the fear of self-expression

Think of the significant people in your life - at home, work, or friends. Do you freely express yourself? Or do you shy away from it? Has it become a repetitive pattern that you simply swallow things instead of telling them what you actually feel? People who don’t express themselves - don’t do so because they fear hurting others. Or getting hurt themselves because they label themselves as sensitive. They feel it would be a point of least damage if they don’t open the can-of-worms called self-expression. They may have either personally had bad experiences in the past or seen...
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What to expect in relationships

Firstly, what are you expecting? And what will happen if your expectations aren’t met? If we expect to be loved, that’s one thing (This may happen, not because you want it. But if they find it fitting in with the rest of their life story - like how you found them fitting in with yours. We can’t force this to happen).  If we expect ourselves to be the only person to be loved the most by them - that’s another thing (That’s more like territorial rights. To own and to be owned is more suited for properties like cars and...
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Discovered the opposite of guilty (Part 2)

Imagine this - you are going to be a part of creating history with a Guinness Book of World Record - with more than 4000  children as participants, 20 cameras, another 5000 teachers and parents waiting outside - you head the Organization that’s attempting to create this record. Feel the heat? Amidst all this, you get a call from someone in your organization - saying they missed their flight to get to the venue this morning - they have 10 kids with them who were supposed to be a part of this event. What would you do? How would you respond? Here’s...
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Discovered the opposite of guilty! 

I am guilty of making people feel guilty! Initially, I did not know that we shouldn’t make others feel guilty. Later, some wise being said, 'never talk to anyone in a way that makes them feel like they owe you an apology'. It made sense. But I did not know what was the opposite of making someone feel guilty. If I wasn’t going to make them feel guilty, what should I make them feel instead? I finally had a eureka moment when I figured what’s the opposite of making someone feel guilty. (Disclaimer - It's going to be a long...
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Reframing – Change the way you think (A powerful NLP technique)

It’s been ages since I thought of this incident. But as I woke up this morning, it just flashed in my mind so clearly. I was in 8th or 9th grade. It was a festival in India (Ganesh puja). We woke up in the morning and my father and I went out to get fresh fruits from the market. We had finished buying all the fruits and I offered to carry the bag of fruits. I had always seen my father offering to help people with their bags and baggages and I thought that was so gentlemanly of him. So,...
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Helping without rescuing…

What I love the most about being a part of this world is that we each want to be useful to someone and help each other out most often. However, helping without rescuing – what is this about and why is it important? Imagine this – Scene 1: A person is drowning – You go and help them and rescue them from drowning. Scene 2: A person is learning to swim – Here, you help them learn. If you rescue them from learning, the odds are that they may not learn the skill of swimming for themselves. Drawing a parallel,...
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